Source:May-not-have-nine-lives/content
"It is said a cat has nine lives. Everybody has heard this gossip. Such wireless stuff may not turn up quite true, but it's a fact that a cat is tough and hard to transfer into hasenpfeffer or rabbit potpie," said the Green Goods Man as he made a noise like a disappearing Chesire [sic] pussy.
"A cat can live anywhere providing it has rats, mice or some other choice meats to lunch upon at odd times. Recently the superintendent of a Pittsburgh skyscrape introduced a cat to the top loft to catch the 'man higher up' I suppose, or some other rat. For a time the cat was on her job good and proper and soon had the rats and roaches all on the run. Lately, however, the cat became lazy. It was discovered that some kind lady was feeding the cat, and it was retiring from the exterminating business. When the rats found out that the cat was not waging relentless war on them they became its fast friends and spent much of the time loafing with it.
"The watchful superintendent observing that a treaty of peace had been concluded between the cat and the rats decided upon a new scheme. He lifted a ferret to the loft and introduce [sic] it to the cat. He thought the presence of the ferret would stir the cat to renewed efforts.
"The cat saw the ferret first. It arched its back and squared for a scrap, but when it saw the hypnotic eyes of the ferret broke for the window, hurled itself through and landed on its feet 20 stories below.
"The cat ran down the street like a streak, jumped over the east market house, ran into the other, skimmed across the fish stand snatching a bass as it skimmed, and was out in a second. When the fishmen recovered from their fright, they chased the cat (they are better at chasing the duck) and found it in Chicken alley picking its teeth with the back fin of the fish. It had eaten all the rest."
